Step 1: Admitting you have a problem
I think I've figured out my problem (well at least my main problem) , and I guess that's the first step. I'm pretty sure I was sort of aware of it before, but I don't think I was able to admit it or simply understand it until now. I had my revelation tuesday during our acting class. We were all siting around in a circle with Luke in the middle holding two water guns, one was full, and the other empty. He went around to everybody, one at a time, and stuck the guns in their faces. The point of this exercise was to experience true emotion. To have an honest reaction without acting. That was never a problem for me. In fact it was always quit easy for me to be in the moment and react truthfully. I really understand the whole idea that acting is really not acting. Now, here comes my problem. I didn't figure it out by myself, Luke actually pointed it out to me. He was saying how when you're in a scene, and lets say your scared because someone is holding a gun to your head. If you get really into it and feel actual fear, then all of a sudden you're like "Oh Yay! I'm scared!", and then your out of it. That, there is my problem. When I begin to actually feel something, I get so excited that before I know it, I'm not feeling it anymore. It's almost as if acting is too fun for me. I know it's a silly thing to say but I mean, even if I'm in a scene where I'm hysterically crying, I find myself really having fun, but I'm crying, and that's not supposed to be fun. I know I have to find a balance, but the question is "How?". I guess that'll be step 2...
AH! This is great! And very important!
ReplyDeleteNow, acting is suppose to be LIKE real life, but it ISN'T ACTUALLY real life, is it? And while we function in a manner very similar to the manner in which we function in a real situation, acting is performance and performance make it different.
In all the arts - this is the important bit and I know I said it in class - we aways approach it from a sense of joy. Yes, it is REALLY FUN to be all scared on stage, or really angry on stage. That joy is the food on which we feed.
Now, sad is an emotion, but fun isn't. We say "I feel sad or I feel happy," but we say "I'm HAVING fun." We don't say "I'm feeling fun." It's not an emotion, it's something else.
You're suppose to have a lot of fun, and underlying all of this work is a sense of fun and a feeling of joy.
There is an element of what to focus on which you'll have to learn, and we will get to that - call it step 2, like you said. It comes with time. In the meanwhile, you made some excellent progress, you're feeling real things in an effortless way, and that's great news to me.